The topic of this post is supposed to be something “Halloweenish.” But I don’t remember this till I turn the page of ye olde spiral bound, paper-pages August-to-August planner and see written for today, in pen: Blog Post: Halloweenish. TODAY?? Today!! Heart-pounding suspense writ all in present tense: will I get a blog post written and posted today? I sit down at my desk, raise my hands shoulder-high, then bring them down on the keyboard like a virtuoso or at least super-dramatic pianist. RRrrrrring! It’s the phone. (which doesn’t really rrrring, but makes a what is for me a shakes-inducing – but not quite satisfying – bleep-bleeeep.) Anyway, Caller ID tells me it’s my daughters’ school calling. There’s been an accident, my 8th grader has lurched and fallen on the school-bus, and has taken a gash to the head. Alarm! Adrenaline! Maternal Terror! I race to the school, a drive riddled with badly-timed stoplights, bikes “sharing” (HOGGING!) the lane, excruciatingly slowly wandering pedestrians meandering, really, just – I mean, don’t they have a schedule to keep? They’re NOT EVEN KEEPING TO THE CROSSWALKS!! At last I scream into a parking spot at school (that is, Iiiiii scream, but the vehicle contributes only eerie silence to this scene because it’s a Hybrid, and also the brakes are perfectly tuned), run full-tilt into the building via the nearest entrance, pound up the stairs, burst into the office. My daughter’s there, blood-soaked hoodie in her lap, blood-soaked towel pressed to the back of her head, black mascara in streaks down her cheeks, eyes puffy and bloodshot. Scary! Cue the sawing Psycho violins!! But she’s actually fine. You know how everybody tells you, helpfully, when you’re bleeding from a gash to the head, that, no biggie, gashes to the head bleed like that? I tell her that. And I tell her that I don’t see any brains coming out, and her little sister tells a funny joke about brains. But what’s really scary is that it also happens to be school-picture retake day, and my poor kid was out sick on the regular picture day and today she’s by now a sweet, ghoulish mess. I hope she will pose for the photo “as is” to immortalize the morning, and to sum up her middle-school experience, which hasn’t really been all that gory, but still, it would be a hoot, especially in the Class Composite Picture. Again with the sawing Psycho violins. BEWARE! BEWARE!
In other news, here are a few books that make for terrific Halloweenish reads. The Woman in White, by Wilkie Collins. You’ve probably read this already. The Enola Holmes mysteries by Nancy Springer. How I love them. The Case of the Left-Handed Lady, The Case of the Missing Marquess, The Case of the Bizarre Bouquets…AND MORE. You are in for a treat if you haven’t yet read this series about the younger sister of Sherlock. Fabulous.